There is a pad of hemp paper to my left, within arms' reach. There is a set of headphones wrapped about my head, hooking behind my ears. It is playing The Yeah Yeah Yeahs. My little brother is behind me, comparing dogs and colorblind people and satan, and just a moment ago, I felt so comfortable, but now I feel so constricted. I often feel like that. I want to go party and not come back until tomorrow morning, at the earliest. Hell, I want to go anywhere. I want to take a road trip with amicable strangers. I want to... live. Breathe. I don't want to be stuck in this craphole of a town with this craphole of a house where the dirt is set into the foundations and the family is tightly loving like a straitjacket- I just got a phone call. He doesn't remember calling me. I feel sick to my soul. I feel a sinking feeling in the back of my head. I feel like almost-ODing on coke and ecstasy (Placebo lyric!) and waking up at Bonnie Brae, listening to my dad crying and ugh, nevermind. I feel like starting a band. I feel like getting the hell outta dodge and moving to San Francisco (Johnny Depp did it! Except he went to LA), taking said roadtrip with said amicable strangers. I wonder... I wonder... I wonder a lot of things. I wonder if it's the hemp paper, or having just returned from Austin, or the new CD that's making me feel this way more than usual, but I feel choked. I should've gone with Kyle that time he asked me to go with him at 2 AM. SHIT! Kyle! He's got an internet connection now (I think), but I haven't been on Yahoo IM at all! Whew, no messages from him. Late night Cartoon Network is bad 4 U.
Last five
Farewell! at 3:57 pm, Jul. 01, 2005
urf. at 10:33 am, May. 03, 2005
Trainwreck lady. at 10:16 am, May. 03, 2005
gvf hbb jnghvbh jlkm jhfgcc at 9:42 am, May. 03, 2005
My Dland is my dream journal now. at 8:43 am, Mar. 25, 2005